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A Cure for the Incurable: Endometriosis and Pregnancy

Well, you know you’re officially a health blogger when you have to write this out for the first time:

I am not a doctor, and nothing I write should be misconstrued as medical advice. I am talking about myself, my personal health, and the things my personal health care providers have advised me.

And in fact, you should take anything you read on the internet with a grain of salt anyway, especially if you have endometriosis. Each case varies so much from woman to woman. Part of the reason endo is such a mystery is how uniquely it affects each one of us. You’re a beautiful unique snowflake, blah blah blah, please don’t try this at home and don’t sue me.

thanks for the unqualified medical advice

Now. On to the post.

Early on, my doctor told me that the best thing for my endometriosis would be to get pregnant. He stressed that there is no cure, but that pregnancy can really help and sometimes even cure endo.

You know what my first thought was?

How marvelous! This disease is totally incurable, but my God can cure it. God has a cure – pregnancy. Doctors can’t cure you but my Lord can!

praise jesus halleluia southern baptist cat

And I know I don’t explicitly talk about my faith a lot on here (because religious squabbles belong in another forum. Far, FAR away from the comment section below) but I still really believe it. I believe I won’t have endo forever. I believe that God can do anything. But a lot has happened since then, and a lot has changed. My faith? Still there. But those “Hallelujah!” feelings? Yeah…they’re gone.

First, I got married. I was planning on that endo or not, but I did think that getting married young would work out pretty well since I need a baby. But there was no rush. I had my first laparoscopy and felt great for three years.

I lived happily ever after. The end. Pinkie pie rainbow gif

I lived happily ever after, the end.

Then I started feeling sick again, and doc said all we could do was another surgery. I asked if I’d need surgeries every three years, and he said that three years was an awesome stint, and while I may last even longer last time, I may also need one sooner.

After the second surgery, I didn’t notice much change. Other than an uglier scar this time, the pain and fatigue were still steadily becoming more and more prominent in my life. I started eating better. I made sure to get a full 8 hours of sleep every day. I tried to exercise when I could, and rest every chance I got. I started taking warm bubble baths to stave away pain instead of using meds when possible. But it was clear that this surgery hadn’t “worked.” And I didn’t want to go through surgery again.

So that’s when we put “baby” on the table.

My doctor said that after operating on me twice, he felt strongly that pregnancy would help me. While delivering a baby can actually give some women endo, my doctor said that in MY case (don’t make me put another legal notice here) I had an 80% of being cured. The idea is that your body gets a chance to “start over.” Your uterus forms when you’re just a baby, but unlike other body parts, it has a chance for an extreme makeover in pregnancy. After stretching way out (and making the pain of endo even worse for those nine months, especially sans medication) it has a chance to shrink back to a happy, non-leaky, less temperamental uterus. And while 80% isn’t perfect, it’s still good odds in my book.

So why didn’t I just throw my arms in the air and say “Praise the Lord!” again?

I mean, it’s not like I don’t want kids. I want kids more than anything! If you watch the Do I Look Sick pinterest, you’ve seen how much I’m pinning to my “Need Kids Now!” board. And notice that  it’s not just called “kids” or “future kids” or “someday…” like most people’s.  I want kids now! Perfect, right?

pinterest mom life will be amazing

Plus I’m in that place Tina Fey was in at the beginning of “baby mama.” I am the weirdo smelling baby’s heads in elevators. On our trip to Disneyland, I smiled and waved and talked to every little kid who looked at me. I showed little girls hummingbirds in the trees, and I let babies in line play with my graduation tassel. And I’m not at the age where all my friends are having babies, but enough of them do for me to wind up holding and playing with babies a lot.

I just graduated from college, and my husband is right behind me and will cross the stage in a few months. Perfect timing, right? It all works out!

crazy girlfriend baby fever

I didn’t realize I’ve become that crazy…thanks a lot google images.

Well, the problem is not having a baby really, the problem is everything else. Literally….everything…..else.

Like that college thing I was talking about. I got a diploma and a husband, I’m set for life! Right? Time to find jobs and get a house! Yup….find jobs….and get a house…

career versus family path

Whoa, hold on a minute! I need those signs to point in the same direction!

I was raised by a stay at home mom while my husband was raised by a nanny. We both turned out fine, but the stay at home mom thing is all I’ve ever known. So of course I want to stay at home with my babies! And luckily, since I want to be a writer, I can write from home and still be the wonderful at home mom I always envisioned myself being.

Of course, I’m not sure who I envisioned writing my paychecks, because the world just does not work that way.

expectations versus reality writing freelance

But what’s great is that I have a college education and real world experience in production! I don’t anticipate it being difficult for me to find a great job. But I do know that finding the “work from home” job of my dreams… probably won’t ever happen. I’ve toyed around a little with the idea of opening a kickstarter or indygogo to try and fund the production of one of my scripts (and essentially pay myself for writing/directing it) but even with that I don’t know where to start. So in short: there’s the issue of money.

But it’s not just an issue of money. There’s also the issue of society’s view of pregnancy. I’ll be blunt: most people associate pregnancy with failure. Your life is over. And people say that jokingly, and I’m sure many of you are quick to say “Not at all! That’s just joking!” but let me explain: how many of you would call having a baby in wedlock wherein both spouses have a college degree failure? I bet the general consensus is that there’s nothing wrong with that. But riddle me this: if your daughter, upon graduating from college, decided to have a baby with her spouse (DECIDED. She CHOSE to TRY to get pregnant) would you be disappointed in her? I mean, why not just wait? Why not start a career first? What parent doesn’t want their little girl to have it all?

pregnancy so you've ruined your life simpsons

It’s not just accidental pregnancies that are looked down on anymore. In fact, in some ways, I think young married couples may even be more looked down on. Accidents happen, but why would you do it on purpose?!

And let’s not forget relationship issues. No couple is perfect, obviously. But I can’t help but feel we need to be…a little more perfect, I guess, to be parents. I know right now we’re in a transitional time. My husband is working hard to graduate, and both of us are navigating transitions in our careers. We’ll be moving soon, and we’d like to be having kids soon….but everything’s so crazy now! We seem to hardly see each other, we eat dinner around midnight (as that’s about when hubby gets home from work), and to be frank, things are tense!

couple fight either way he needs to suffer stupid boy

But things get better after college right? Things will settle down? We’ll have more money once we don’t have tuition anymore…right?

Remember the other day when my car exploded? Yeah. So we had to get a new (to us) one. And for one week (this week) we literally have no money. I’m waiting on our paycheck for the saddest, most ridiculous reasons. Like to buy stamps and toilet paper. And cereal. This was unpredictable, but what would we do in some kind of crisis like this if we had a baby? We need more security.

We need more money.

We need to be older.

We need more support.

We need to be closer.

We need to be stronger Christians.

We need to stop cussing so much.

We need to eat healthier food and plan meals.

We need more space.

We need a nicer neighborhood.

tough decision stress anxiety freak out

And when I reach points of extreme conflict and intense desperation, I google sad rhetorical questions like a little emo kid and find a lot of advice like this:

“Don’t worry! If you wait until you’re ready/you have more money/you have a career you’ll never have kids! Just do what you think is right.”

So I become pensive. And I pray. I try to be quite and listen to my heart. Or my brain. Or my soul.

heart versus head tough decision

And this is what it says:

WHAA I’M HURTING AND SICK ALL THE TIME, MAKE IT BETTER!

We have no money. We have no money. We have no money.

OMG WANT BABY WANT FAMILY WANT LOVE

Stake your claim to fame, make art, make a difference in the world.

But I am le tired. I don’t want to go to work.

My parents would be disappointed.

Why not just let good enough alone?! Stay the course!

I don’t want to take medicine.

But what can I do? Have another surgery? Remove my uterus altogether?

First world problems! It’s not like your pain is unbearable!

I can’t live this way.

What if being baby crazy is just a phase?

I’ll regret it.

It feels so right.

It feels so wrong.

My heart wants a baby. My heart wants to be a mom. My brain says that’s irrational, illogical, and impossible.

But the worst voice is my body’s.

It just wants to not be sick anymore.

if you had the chance to change your fate would you brave

I want too much.

There are risks and rewards with any treatment method. When you’ve got invisible, chronic illness, there will always be tough decisions to make. What your heart wants and what your mind wants might be totally different, and there’s no good way to know what you need.

Moral dilemmas. Ethics. A cure. A cost.

I think only someone who’s walked with illness knows how desperate people can get for a cure. We see heroes, like Shiloh from Repo! – which I’ll be posting about soon –  as much as villains, like the dinosaur man who tries to kill Spiderman. The signs and clues all seem to be 50/50 – do it/don’t.

But what a way to be cured, huh? How wonderful to tell your child one day, “you saved mommy.”

But how terrible… to shoulder the guilt of wanting pregnancy for yourself. Somehow it feels like you’re not supposed to want a baby to benefit yourself, only them. Will they question my love? Will they wonder if they were only born for my sake?

And the scariest uncertainty of all… what if it doesn’t work, and then you’re a mom with endometriosis?

conspiracy keanu

That’s a whole ‘nother post.

 

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About rachelmeeks

My name is Rachel Meeks. I have endometriosis, an incurable pain condition, IBS, a digestive illness, and PCOS, which causes irregular periods and infertility. After keeping my illnesses a secret, I started to get upset about how my fellow sick people were being mistreated because of ignorance. I knew that I'd need to stand up, make some noise, wear my heart on my sleeve, and admit that I am not well to make a difference.

55 responses to “A Cure for the Incurable: Endometriosis and Pregnancy

  1. Julia ⋅

    I am a mom with endo… 3 kids and then a historectomy… I made the choice when I wa d 18 to have a baby eary in life not for a “cure” but to be sure as to not miss my chance to be a mom. 3 kids did not cure my endo. Money gets tight but my babies are the biggest rewarding blessing ever! Good Luck

    • That is so beautiful! One of life’s greatest gifts is to a mom. So happy to see that appreciated. You are so lucky!! =)

      — Christine @ xtinedanielle.wordpress.com

    • Thank you so much for your encouraging response. I think I’ll want to do the same thing if endo isn’t cured, but the idea of a hysterectomy is still really scary to me. But I’ve always known I wanted to be a mom, and I want to be an early mom. Thanks for the encouragement on the money side of things too – I really needed to hear that.

    • babygirl ⋅

      I’m 19 year old and I think I have it because my mom has it and I worry alot that I can’t have kids… me and my boyfriend have been together almost 3 years and has had unprotected sex more than a year and no chances. it breaks my heart to know I might not be able to have the feeling of being a mother, and I just don’t know what people’s gonna think or even my doctor

  2. I WAS A MOM WITH ENDO——- I WAS ABLE TO HAVE ONE CHILD– A MIRACLE CHILD– THEN A DIVORCE– & LATER REMARRIED- & NOT ABLE TO HAVE ANY MORE CHILDREN—ALL I CAN SAY IS– DON’T HAVE A BABY FOR HEALTH REASONS & — HAVE A CHILD BECAUSE — THAT IS THE ONLY REASON –YOU WANT A CHILD– NO OTHER REASONS– YOU WANT A BABY–& BE A PREPARED PARENT– AS YOU CAN VERY WELL BE A PARENT WITH ENDO- BEING A PARENT IS HARD ENOUGH WITH OUT HAVING A BABY FOR ALL THE WRONG REASONS!!

    • Thanks for the encouragement. Being a mom with endo is very intimidating, I want to be able to keep up with my kiddos! I’ve always wanted to be a mom, and i’d love to have a baby today if I could! But it’s a little scary too. So many mixed up feelings!

  3. My choice is to not try for kids anymore, as I’ve had two miscarriages and have only gotten sicker over time with fibro. I mentor a 12-year-old girl with a mom who lives with chronic illness, and my heart just hurts so bad to hear her say, “I wish I could make her better.”

    • I worry a lot about miscarrying. But I do want to try. If I can’t have a baby, then that’s out of my hands. My aunt has Lupus, and it’s very sad the way her twin children worry about her. But I also want to show my kids (and other kids, and every one) that life is worth living no matter what. There are always bad days and good. I want them to know that no matter what problems they may have, they can choose to be happy and enjoy life. Whether that means they’re born disabled or just have a tired mommy, life won’t be perfect, but it’s still so good.

  4. This is wonderful. You are wonderful and so brave, and I know you will make the right decision, whatever your decision is and whatever that decision is based upon. The fact that you took the time to vocalize and verbalize all of your fears, hopes, and dreams surrounding a potential pregnancy shows your incredible maturity and wisdom. You go, girl!!

    • I totally agree! Such a great comment, too.

    • Thanks so much! i was actually quite worried about putting these thoughts out there like this. I thought I’d get some heavy backlash, but I hoped it would be helpful to anyone else in this dilemma. I’ve gotten so much support though, and no one’s talked down to me or anything, and that’s a great feeling. 🙂 Thanks for saying I’m mature too, another great fear was that this would all sound very IMmature. 🙂

  5. Amanda ⋅

    This is such a well thought out and written post. I agree that there is no perfect time, but obviously there are better times- only you can figure that out. I’m sure you’ll be an amazing mother!

    • Thanks so much, all the support has really been meaningful to me. I hear so many stories of chronically ill people who are told they shouldn’t have kids at all because they might make them sick or be unable to care for them. I’m so glad to find so much love and support from everyone. 😀

  6. Hey Rachel! OMGosh girl, great post. I have got to say that we have so much in common, it’s cray! So I also recently graduated with my Master’s. I’ve been in school a LONG time. My husband’s still working on finishing his under grad and works full time. I am currently job searching, searching, searching… (did you hear the echo I intended?) — and it’s just nuts. I know what a PROCESS the job search thing is but yeah.. it gets old.. quick!
    I’ve just recently started following you and your blog so I’m just learning of all your trials and tribulations with your endo diagnosis. Girl, you have been through a lot. I can totally feel ya on the pregnancy thoughts, too. I’m ready to get off birth control and leave those days behind. We were just married back in August, so we’re still newlyweds and I’m not exactly planning to get pregnant anytime soon. I was diagnosed with PCOS at age 18 and have been on the pill forever. I’m now 25 and don’t want it in my system anymore but husband is fighting me on this one. Hehe. So you see, I don’t think I will have such an easy time getting pregnant at all. You are so funny.. hehe “smelling babies’ heads in elevators and at Disneyland.”
    May I ask, how long have you and your husband been married? I know, as a newlywed, it’s so exciting starting this life and journey together. There’s so many opportunities and the future is still unknown. Oh yeah, I don’t see getting pregnant as a failure at all. It’s a huge success in my book! It sounds as though your heart and soul are in line with one of your biggest desires in life — to have children. I think that’s beautiful. I was like that before my brain stem surgery. I wanted nothing more than to have children and I have a very strict ten year plan.. I told my husband that we just had to be pregnant by the time I was 27, etc. Well, since I’ve been dealt a different set of cards and one hell of a curve ball last year, I’ve decided to not be in such a rush with that plan anymore.
    How can I possibly bring a child into this life and not be able to fully take care of it? Let alone, be well enough to take care of myself first so I can provide everything for my baby. You might of read in my blog that I still currently deal with an eye condition called nystagmus. My eyes involuntarily shake making it hard to see sometimes. This is a residual effect from the cavernoma in my brain stem that I had removed. I pray everyday that this will subside, go away, and heal as soon as possible — but I’m a year post op and who knows what will happen with it. I also get really sensitive to sound when I over do myself. I have to take it easy. So that’s a BIG problem because babies tend to cry, ya know? & kids tend to be loud? Hehe — so yeah! Those are just a couple reasons.
    Agh, Rachel, my dear — I’ve written you a book! If you’d ever like to chat, do let let me know. As you can see, you are definitely not alone in this. I can totally relate to you on soo many levels.
    Have a beautiful day, sister!

    — Christine @ xtinedanielle.wordpress.com

    • Christine,

      Thank you so so much for your lovely comment. We do have a crazy amount of things in common, it’s totally freaky. But in a good way. I think we’ll be good friends. 🙂

      My husband and I are about to celebrate our 3 year wedding anniversary, and we’ve been a couple for 6 years. So we feel like it’s been forever but we’re still very young, it’s a weird place to be haha.

      Who knows? I’m like you, I’m so done being on birth control. But like you, I’ve been on it forEVER, and there is something a little scary about stopping all of a sudden. My heart and soul definitely want a baby, too. While we’re still not sure what to do, I think I’m going to quit the pill at the end of this cycle. I’ve planned on that for a couple of cycles now, but this time the timing feels right to try. And getting pregnant? Well….we’ll see. My doc said not to try in earnest until I’ve been off the pill for a few months so we can monitor endo and start alternative pain treatments if needed.

      So yes. Things are still mixed up and uncertain. But I think both of us are moving forward, and that’s what’s really important. 🙂

  7. Rachel – What an honest and heart wrenching post. Thank you for feeling comfortble enough to share with all of us. Unfortunately, only you can make the decision of what you should do but at least you are talking about it.

  8. Saw this tweet about an upcoming tweet chat & thought you might be interested in checking it out.

    @bpreparedperiod: Are u familiar w/ #Endometriosis? We are raising awareness w/a special tweet chat w/ @EndoResCenter 3/8 – Details @ http://t.co/56N4JFSuDZ

    I want to learn more so I’ll probably be participating.

    — Christine @ xtinedanielle.com

  9. Molly

    Hey, I also just wanted to say this is an awesome post. I feel like you covered a huge spectrum of emotions and possibilities and demonstrated an incredible thoughtfulness. And I wanted to wish you good luck as you keep working on your decision. Just curious, how does your husband feel about having a baby? Is he going through the same back-and-forth reasoning with you?

    P.S. From what I’ve heard (like from my mom) a lot of those “need to be”s can be easier to accomplish with a new baby as motivation! Cussing less, especially. 🙂

    • I sure hope that’s true about the cussing. It’s a terrible habit!

      Husband is in a very similar place as me. I tried not to speak for him, but he’s got his own pros and cons about it. For instance, he’s much more worried about money, etc. but not nearly as concerned with the social implications or people disapproving of it. I’ve been wanting a baby forever, and his baby fever is definitely a newer development.

  10. I had to read this twice. It was that good . Pregnancy did cure my sisters endo and her first baby was at 34. So she suffered many years because of the draw of “the career”. She has since told me she wish she had them sooner because if the double blessing… No more endo and babies – yay! Big decisions for you and hubby. Praying for you!

  11. People have kids for so many reasons. Some just because they didn’t do anything to prevent it. I think you have layers or reasons. It’s not just for your health. That’s a factor and it should be. I think the fact that you think so much about your decision proves you will be a good mom whether it be now or in a few more years. 🙂

    • Thank you so much for the encouragement, especially on it being okay to factor in my health. I go back and forth on if that’s okay, and so does this comment section haha. Thank you though, this comment meant a lot to me.

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  13. ajaytao2010 ⋅

    thanks for visiting my blog ajaytao2010@wordpress.com

  14. This is a brilliant and beautiful post, thanks so much for sharing. Whether you’ve got endo or not people will always say things like ‘there is never a right time’ etc so let’s dismiss that one off the bat! The fact that you guys are in a loving, happy marriage is enough to provide a solid base for a family, if that’s what you want. I agree curing endo should not be the underlying cause for having a baby but I don’t think that’s the issue here for you guys 🙂

    If it is just moving things forward, I feel it is really important to say this and hope I don’t freak anyone out – but there are always more factors to making babies. When you break down the stats and all the insanely intricate systems that need to be ‘just so’ I feel like it is a miracle that anyone ever gets pregnant at all! I say this because I didn’t get diagnosed with endo UNTIL we were trying to get pregnant (my symptoms were masked by the pill) – and that was on top of polycystic ovaries and then the news of a bilateral tubal blockage caused by scarring from the endo. It was hell. I’m now one week away from giving birth to our first baby (fingers crossed), nobody is really sure how we got around the tubal blockage, but we were due to start IVF just before we found out. Of course I’m yet to find out whether I’m ‘cured’ but we can only hope…

    Your heart wants to be a mother, that part is clear. The rest is moot. I’m biased, but still. That’s my two cents (which here in Australia gets rounded down to nothing at the till, so, you know).

    • Thank you so, so much for this wildly encouraging post! In college biology, I had the same feeling during the reproductive chapter – how on earth does ANYONE EVER get pregnant?!?!? I do feel like it’s going to be really difficult, just because of the basic mechanics of the whole thing. Seriously, it boggles my mind.

      Your comment means a lot to me, and really really eased my stress about the small stuff, especially what other people think. We really really do want a baby – your blog doesn’t help, haha!

      I think in three weeks I’m going to start waning myself off the pill. It’ll be a few months of monitoring symptoms and probably throwing up before we’ll be able to really start trying….but we’re going to get the ball rolling now. 🙂

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  16. Dear Rachel, In appreciation for your support, advice and friendship I have nominated you for the Best Moments Award. I hope you will accept this award. http://tersiaburger.wordpress.com/wp-admin/post.php?post=2595&action=edit&message=6&postpost=v2

    • Thank you so much Terisa. I’m honored to ever get to speak to you, and even MORE honored to be nominated for an award from you! Apologies for falling off the planet for a bit, but I can’t wait to accept!

  17. I feel like the possible cure for your disease is a sign telling you to go the baby route no matter what your financial circumstances. I wish I had something to push me definitively.

    • I feel that way too! And actually, our financial life has since taken a turnaround – we’re by no means rich, but I just started a job that pays a lot more, so the money is coming soon….. While we’re not officially “trying” yet (I need to talk to my army of doctors to figure out how to safely wean myself off of the meds I’m currently on) we have invested in a new, reliable car, and we’re looking for a new place to live with Baby in mind. I’m definitely going crazy with baby fever, but I tell myself we’re working towards it, soon, soon!

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  21. Dana ⋅

    I just realized I was reading your blog that was written over a year ago and was curious how things turned out and if you indeed got pregnant…
    I’m in a similar situation as yours, diagnosed with endo, had lapro surgery, and now trying to get pregnant. Like you I’ve always wanted babies but been so busy with school, then establishing ourselves professionally and financially that the 10 yrs of our marriage have passed by so quickly and I realized that at 39 I better hurry up and get pregnant if I was to still have kids. My endo pain started just 6 months ago, which was when I was diagnosed with endo, although apparently I’ve had it for years. Praying for a miracle baby now!!

    • The short answer is no, I don’t think so. Prepare yourself for my WAY TOO LONG answer, haha.

      I’m at a point now where my doctor wants me to go in for surgery #3, but after surgery #2 I decided I wanted to try for kids. I gave myself a deadline – which will come in about two months – and if I still wasn’t pregnant, I’d have the 3rd surgery and maybe start fertility treatments if it looks like we need it. About a month ago, I thought I was pregnant but after a gazillion at home tests, a blood test, and a sonogram, we concluded that no, I’m not. However, now I still have no period and I’m over a month late! My doctor is stumped. The only think he can figure is that maybe I am pregnant after all, and it was too early OR that I got pregnant sometime during the testing we were doing. I hope that’s what’s up. I’m in a ton of pain and I’m hoping it’s for a good reason and not just endo getting worse. I’m actually going in today for a blood test and pelvic exam. Fingers crossed for me!

      Sorry I’m a slow responder, I try to give thoughtful responses to all comments on my site and it’s easy to get behind. I see you posted about a month ago – any good news?

      • Natasha ⋅

        Hi, thank you so much for your blog, it’s a great help. What was the result of your recent tests? Are you okay and have you managed to conceive yet? My little sister is at the worst stage of endo, having had half her bladder removed. Doctors are advising pregnancy but her and her partner have split and she may have to go for a donor before she needs a colostomy bag as its growing all over he lower pelvic region now, in and out of the uterus. Her career as an occupational therapist has ony just kicked off but it’s also a tough job. They say that if you have a lapro, your womb is ready for conception pretty much right away as its removed the endo growths that are preventing the egg from attaching.
        It will be very interesting to hear how you are getting on.

      • Complicated answer haha, we found out that in addition to endo I also have PCOS, which means getting pregnant has been tough. I’m on the last fertility pill we have to try before moving to daily injections. We decided to have a baby over a year ago, so just keep in mind that it’s not a straightforward decision at all – baby making is hard and lots of unexpected obstacles can get involved.

        My biggest advice would be to NOT have a baby solely to help with endo. If your sister WANTS a baby already and has the means to care for it, then rock on. But seriously don’t seek a donor to make an endo-cure baby. It’s the most expensive treatment for endo there is. If your sister wants kids eventually then I understand what a tough situation that is. But she may need to consider complete removal of the uterus if having a baby is not a high priority. It’s NOT a definite cure for endo, but it will help. Endo can come back but typically it takes years after a hysterectomy for it to do that, and it’s usually much more mild.

        If she does want kids eventually, my best advice would be to check out the Violet Petal study or another medical research study. Usually there is little or no cost, and since there are not any endo treatments on the market already that really work great, I think it’s your best bet. Also, has she tried Seasonique or another longer-than-average birth control pill? Seasonique gives you 4 periods a year, instead of 12. That means 4 cycles of endo growth a year instead of 12 – for me, that got rid of the pain for three entire years – which in your sister’s case could give her time to find a mate and then think about if they WANT kids. Again I want to stress that a baby is NOT a good treatment unless you wanted a baby in the first place, with or without endo.

        Also remember I’m not a doctor – this is just my thoughts based on my personal experience. All women are different and what worked for me may not work for your sister. I wish her all the best – please do stay in touch and let me know how she’s feeling!

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  23. endoended

    I found a way to cure my endometriosis without having to get pregnant.

  24. Reeda ⋅

    This has been quite inspirational to me. I would love to see how everything turns out for you. I’m from Ghana where endometriosis isn’t talked about much. I had to be diagnosed with catamenial pneumothorax before I had an in depth knowledge about endometriosis. I have had painful menstruation since I was 11 years old. The only comforting words I got from the women in my family was it will stop when I give birth. Unfortunately for me, I didn’t get married as early as they did and my diagnosis was made when I was 26years and planning to settle down. It took a near death experience for the doctors to confirm the diagnoses. I also had some uterine fibroids at the same time. The doctors reiterated what my mom and granny had told me in the past. Unfortunately, my relationship at that time couldn’t survive all that pressure. I have always wanted children and my friends with kids always tell me I’m good with them, they just love me. But getting a partner to love me with endo has been challenging. It’s sad that some people in my part of the world cannot look at the bigger picture of being in a relationship with someone. My fiance at that time left in spite of all the arrangement we were making towards marriage. I’m still hopeful at 28years. I still so much desire children but I have learned to trust God. I believe my Help is on the way.
    God bless you for this post.

    • Thank you so much for the kind words and for sharing your powerful story. I always say that endo is really good at weeding out the not so great guys. It does take a lot for a relationship to survive endo, especially when it’s hard to get treatment. I’m happy to report that I’m currently 26 weeks pregnant and I have indeed been symptom-free! Only time will tell if I continue to feel healthy after the pregnancy is over. I have high hopes.

      I’ll say a prayer for you, and I hope you find a guy who’s stronger than endo very soon. In the mean time, don’t give up! And know that good things are on the way. 🙂

      • Elissa ⋅

        So I realize your original post was four years ago but I’ve caught up on all the comments. Your words really touched me and made me feel normal. Congrats on being 26 weeks ^ but I’m sure now have the most perfect bundle of joy!

        I’ve never met someone whose life was so similar. I’m 21 years old and in my last year of college. My boyfriend and I have been together for 7 years. I was diagnosed with endo at age 14, have been on, what feels like, every pill ever created. I’ve also had my first surgery in January along with a 6 month shot of lupron depot. Nothing has even given me the slightest relief and my doctor has recently mentioned that pregnancy could help/cure me.

        I understand every women and case is different but just wondering how your endo is doing after your pregnancy?

        Also, I can only imagine the love you give your child. He/she will one day see the strong decision you made and know that they saved mommy!

    • We now have a 10 month old boy crawling all over the place and I want to emphasize that I am extremely happy that we were able to have him. Every day is better because of him.

      That being said, about a month ago I started feeling those old crappy endo feelings. I’m researching and trying to find an endo specialist in my area- my OB proved to be a bad match for me during pregnancy and his lack of current knowledge made me seriously question his choices for my treatment thus far. Again- I am super happy I have this little guy, and pregnancy + 10 months is over a year of being symptom free, which is more than I can say about the third surgery I had.

      There just has to be other options than surgery that helps for such a short time (and that I’m still paying off).

      But like I said, it really was over a year of being completely symptom free. That’s huge! And it sucks to be in pain again (and doctorless…)

      But c’est la vie I suppose. I’m happy and I have an adorable amazing son and endo sucks, but it’s far from taking up my entire life. A new doctor will be a fresh start and we’ll see what happens from there. 🙂

  25. Pingback: Book Review: What to Expect When You’re Expecting | Do I Look Sick?

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