Something is wrong with me, and it doesn’t seem like it’s endo (although endo has surprised me before with it’s vast and diverse portfolio of ways to torture me).
I woke up this morning feeling weird and bad. I feel extremely nauseous, though I have yet to throw up. I actually tried a little, and I even took emitrol which is a good indicator of how completely terrible I must be feeling. Emitrol is disgusting. My stomach hurts a lot, but not in the usual endo ways. It feels like I was doing sit ups, coughing, and shivering all night. My abs are on fire. My lower back is also killing me. It hurts most of all, though I’m pretty sure that the culprit there is slouching all day and sleeping in the fetal position. I haven’t tried eating, but drinking water and sprite makes the nausea unbearable. The only thing that helps is sleep. I slept until about 12:30, and by golly I want to sleep some more, but I just can’t anymore.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?? I want to call my doctor, but I feel bad doing that because if he wants me to come in I know there is no way I can make the hour long journey right now. So what can he do? Why bother him?
I feel horrible for taking the day off. It’s one of those days where I’m pretty sure I could drag myself to the office, and be awake and lucid and do good work, but I feel soo bad, and I’d rather feel soo bad in my bed than at my desk.
Part of the reason I feel so guilty is that I don’t know what’s wrong. I feel like my husband doesn’t really believe me, and heck, I feel like I don’t completely believe myself. So on top of feeling physically all bent out of shape, mentally I’m a guilt-wrought wreck as well.
I think I have some kind of gastrointestinal issue. I’ve thought so for a while now, as I go through periods of experiencing pain after eating and heartburn and indigestion. But my horrible experience with Dr. Rogoff has discouraged me from pursuing diagnosis further. Plus, a lot of those symptoms could just be endo, which also throws a wrench in things.
Anyway, in conclusion, whaaaaa I feel bad and I just want to sleep more!!! Someone tell me what to do!!!